Reflecting on Control and Acceptance

Today, investigate your relationship with control.

Reflect and journal on the following prompts. Be sure to use curiosity and compassion when exploring these prompts, and seek support from a trusted friend or advisor if the answers feel stirring or difficult to confront.


1. Do you feel the need to maintain power over aspects of your life (personal and romantic relationships, family dynamics, events in the workplace)? Or do you trust the natural ebb and flow and allow others to assert themselves as well?

2. Do you insist things are done your way, even in matters of personal choice? Or do you allow spontaneity and adapt to letting others plan occasionally?

3. Do you have a fear of losing control? This may be rooted in events that left you feeling helpless and vulnerable. How would it look or feel to resolve that fear?

Letting Go

One of the ways to explore the loosening of controlling behavior is to explore your relationship with acceptance.

Acceptance allows us to be with whatever is happening without trying to change it. To be clear, acceptance is not apathy or defeatism; we do not passively put up with everything that happens to us. It may make perfect sense to take steps to change things that are not supporting our highest good. Acceptance comes in when we cannot change our experience, only our response to that experience.

So consider the attitude of acceptance as the practice of accepting pain as inevitable, but suffering as optional. And find the grip of control loosening each time we are willing to be present to this attitude.

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